An Open Letter to French Television

I have a bone to pick with you, French television. I know you're trying your best, but I just don't think I can take it any more. Why must there be so many shows featuring round table discussions on dreadfully boring topics that no one can possibly be interested in? Why must the too-numerous-to-count American shows that you continuously run be so unfortunately dubbed into French rather than subtitled like they are in other countries? Can't you see that the words don't match the moving mouths and don't you know how annoying that is? And why does it feel like every time I try to watch your nature channel I see the exact same program on giant pandas in China? I mean, they're cute, but so are dolphins, penguins, and baby elephants. Can't you do something on them?

Now, I'll admit that there are some things you do well. There are almost no commercials on your channels, which is a welcome change from ad-saturated American programming. Imagine the joy of being able to watch an entire episode of Law and Order without any interruptions! Of course, because of the dubbing, Detective Briscoe sounds more like a French boulanger than one of NYPD's finest, but I digress. Oh, and you do have some decent cooking shows, not to mention the always interesting EuroNews channel. But it's just not enough to allow for the occasional hour or two of 21st century leisure time.

I know, I know, people don't come to France to watch T.V. They come to marvel at cathedrals, taste their way through wine regions, and admire famous works of art. They don't come here to see you, French Television. Can you blame them?